Loneliness...

I had an argument with SC on Saturday that made me quite unhappy for the whole night. In fact, I didnt even go out for dinner with him. I just stayed at home on my own. Even BB went out with him for dinner. I gave him excuses by saying that I was tired but he knew that I was just showing face. But, he thought I was showing faces to his mom instead. I guess he didnt know what was wrong after all. SC actually said a few days back that we would be going out for shopping together with BB on Saturday. Both me and BB were actually looking forward to that day. When that day really came, instead of going to malls, we ended up at various workshops. BB cant even sleep comfortably that time. I was very disappointed in him. Although it is not a big deal but I actually made a promise with BB and I didnt want to break it at any cost. Just when we were looking forward to it, everything went haywire. BB was so tired that she took short nap all along the way. I wanted her to sleep comfortably but SC insisted of staying at the workshop instead of going back. I got even disappointed. I was speechless. I came home, moody. Not knowing how to handle, I decided to take some rest with BB. That night I was thinking. In fact, I realized quite a number of facts of myself. I actually felt like exploding that night and I wanted to talk it out but then only I realized, I had noone that I could talk to. I no longer keep in touch with my best friends. I guess I was left out in my old buddies group. I cant talk to my mom because she's now even near me. I was so pathetic that time. There is not a single person that would listen to my whining and console me when I'm down now. I am no longer who I was previously, I used to have my best friends to talk to, but not now. Everyone have their own life and I have mine too. Being in a family relationship is not easy at all. I can no longer think of breaking up if I'm not happy, or even breaking up when we are not meant for each other. No more considerations. Bond had been tied and it can no longer break. Breaking up is not an option anymore. Solutions must be made without breaking the family ties. It is not an easy task at all. Sometimes, I couldnt even handle it. How I wish I had someone to talk to...